Just Another Epic Dream

I've been having this dream twice now. It's really cool (well, I think it is, haha) and Harry-Potter themed, and I really wish it would happen in real life... maybe not, since in this dream Voldemort is chasing us through some sort of Vegas-like town.

On a side note, I really need to cut my nails. I can't type with such long awful nails!

My dream opens in a dingy hotel, in a Vegas-like town. Okay maybe a motel, because it looked very run down and not well maintained. It was a big place though, with lots of stories high. I was with people, mostly girls, I have never met before, but their faces looked very familiar, and we were huddling in the middle of the room we were staying in. The room we were in had ten or so beds in it, making it look like a camp room. Our things were stashed in a corner and the room overall was not well kept.

I don't remember what we were talking about, but it was serious business since everyone's faces looked glum and thoughtful. I knew we were being chased by Voldemort, and my best guess is that we needed a new hideout since he was hunting us down, big time. All I remember after that is that someone suggested that we head to Hogwarts and try to spy on Professor Snape and the rest of the Death Eaters. Apparently Voldemort's gang had made Hogwarts their head quarters.

Myself and three others decided to head to Hogwarts and try to figure out what they were doing while the others stayed and kept watch in the motel. I got on my broom with the other three and flew to Hogwarts at dusk in order to keep detection at a minimum. We hid in a cave dug out from a hill that faced the school. It started raining after a while, and then we saw Professor Snape head towards the cave we were hiding in. We didn't know how he saw us or how he knew we were there, but we panicked and we mounted our brooms and headed back to the hotel, knowing that we were seen already.

Hoping that we were not going to be followed, I told our group to lean to the left side while flying because the wind was also blowing in that direction, and we would reach the motel faster. It worked for a while, but the wind separated our group, and I ended up with this girl, let's call her Lilian for the time being. Now Lilian's family seemed to have owned the motel we were staying in because we entered the motel through the main entrance and she told security at the front to just let me in since I was with her.

In the time that we were gone, apparently a huge party started in the motel. And it was a fancy party for a motel, mind you (hence the reason why I still find it difficult to say if we were in a hotel or motel). Everyone was in heels and fancy dresses, and the men were donning tuxedos and some were even in masks, like it was a masquerade ball. Lilian was already sprinting in front of me and half-shouting at me, telling me to get ready for the party. I gave her a wild look but played along nevertheless. When I got to our room, one of the girls who got separated from us warned me that some of the people in party downstairs might be Death Eaters, so I have to be careful. I got dressed and got out of the room, and I remember I was wearing a red and black dress of some sort, and I saw this guy in the middle of the party looking up at me. I could tell in my dream that I like him.

And that is where my dream ends.

Isn't it so lame how it ended that way?! Ugh. The first time I had this dream, pretty much the same thing happened. Isn't it so cool though? It's like a modern Harry Potter... minus Harry Potter.

Home!

Finally back home! Now time to start looking for a job. I can never get a job in this damn town, I hate it. Like hey, look at me! Yes, at me. I've been looking for a job at every place imaginable for 3 years now, mind giving me one? I probably wouldn't care if you gave me the worst shifts or what, because I need money for university. Oh, life, y u so tragic?!

Seriously, someone give me a job, please?

I left my blue curacao and cooking oil back in my university townhouse. I wanna go back and get it, but I don't know. Hopefully my house mate takes them with her and not flush them down the sink. I have had that blue curacao since first year, it's part of me! I'm kidding. But seriously, that stuff is great. And my cooking oil! That bottle is still half full!

I did all my unpacking today. Man, was that a chore. My back hurts, my biceps ache, my thighs are numb. But it's all done and organized, so I'm really glad! I need to buy graduation cards for my friends back home, study for my license, await for my grades...

If I do not get a job this summer, I'm thinking of making my little summer novella. I haven't written stories in a while, and I miss it so much.

I'm also of thinking of putting up beauty tutorials (snort) or something like that here. I have a love-hate relationship with makeup. I don't know. It's something about that stuff. Like you really don't need it, to be honest. But they're just so fun to play with. I have a glitter cream palette from NYX right, and it's the Pretty in Pink one.

I can never, EVER, wear this on a daily basis, but it's just so damn pretty I just had to buy it (don't complain wallet, it wasn't that expensive). I love playing with the glitters when I'm bored. I can wear this on top of a purple smokey eye if I'm going downtown and hitting the bars with the house mates, but how often does that happen? Approximately never. Like once during the entire school year. Fail!

Already Taken

So I just repositioned myself on my chair and every bone on the lower half of my spine cracked. It feels good... but feels weird at the same time. I feel like my bones are going to collapse on themselves one of these days. I remember when I cracked my hip in the library and I felt old. Like "I-need-a-hip-replacement" old. And speaking of hip replacements, they just terrify me. Ugh. Can you imagine something that isn't your bone (or bone at all) stuck up there? But then people get organ transplants all the time, and that doesn't scare me... which is weird.

One more final to go! I just can't wait to go home... and begin the ever-strenuous task of looking for a summer job. I just hate it - every summer I bust my ass trying to look for a job, but I'm never successful. Oh well, here's to hoping I get hired!

My room is a mess. I'm half packing, half studying, but I should study soon. And I should up meet up with my friend to do some pre-final reviewing.

I Refuse (to study)

Seriously, what I am doing? I have two finals on Monday and I'm just chilling, pretty much not doing anything. So I've decided to make a post dedicated to (my) engineer. Let's lighten things up a bit, my previous post is all dark and gloomy and emo-ey.

Friday, (gotta get down on Friday! wow, I did not just do that) April 8.

It was the last day of classes. My friend and I got out of class pretty early, so we decided to head to the University Center or simply the UC, to pass time. Unbeknownst (ooo big word!) to us, the UC was flocked with fourth year engineering students who had their graduating projects/ inventions on display. They were in suits, them fourth years. Nothing looks sexier on a man than a well-fitted suit. Anyway, my friend and I were looking at some projects and didn't really bother to get anything explained to us since we're Science kids and anything beyond Science that involves Physics and how to the world works is pretty much out of our basic understanding, so we decided to sit down in our usual spots - the mangy couches behind the stairs. Before that though, we were looking at a voice-automated bar tending machine, which was pretty cool in my opinion, but the guy who "invented" it wasn't really paying attention to the passersby who were waiting for him to explain his work (but he was just too busy gloating over his "cool" invention, whatever). We were walking towards the project behind the voice automated bar tending machine and trying to read their poster board (something about a stove being powered by plant oil) and one of the guys who did the project jokingly asked us why we looked so confused, and then he proceeded to explain their project to us. He was really nice - I wasn't paying much attention to him for the first couple of minutes or so, but the three of us talked for a quite a while. He asked us what programs we were in, what year we were in, what subjects we were taking, that kind of thing. Then after a while, he shifted his gaze at me, and that's when it hit me.

He was (still is) hands-down gorgeous.

He's blonde, blue eyed, a little taller than me. It hit me like a bus (think Mean Girls!). For the last 7 minutes or so, I talked with him, staring into those beautiful eyes and silently crying in agony, because of all things, he was graduating. Which means, I am never going to see him again. I wish I knew his name, or got his name (and number? Teehee). I had to leave for I had Chemistry, but I swore I wanted to see him again, so right after Chemistry I passed by his stall again and of all things, he was texting. When I got back from the grocery I wanted to pass by him again, but alas, the project exhibition was over. Oh, the pain, the agony. Why are all the hot ones taken, gay, or graduating?

My friend has seen him once after that, and they actually smiled and waved at each other. Oh, the pain, the agony. I have till Wednesday here in school, and I need to see him before I leave  and before he graduates. Determination~!

Finality

I've realized that I can't do any more work for tonight so I'm calling it quits. There is absolutely no reason for me to force myself to study when my brain can't function (what's new).

It's over, it's done. I do have my regrets, but none too grave. As what people say, "Never regret anything, because at that time it was exactly what you wanted". Or something along those lines. Of course it's hard. We were together for a very long time. I shared every tear and laugh and ache with him in that time. He was my everything. Was. But do you know what's harder? When you go back to that kind of mess and it happens again. I don't deserve that, I don't need that.

Sometimes I think that my reasons for ending the relationship is a little shallow - but it's been piling on for a while, and what he did was the cherry on top (in a bad way). I'm young, it's not the end of the world. I'm glad I have very supportive friends who have held me together through this. And with every day that passed by without him - I realize that I am really better off. I laugh harder, I smile more often. I have time for myself, for my friends, for things that actually matter. No more sitting in front of my laptop waiting for him to video call with me while he spends every living minute of his life playing with his online buddies. I then realize all the bull I put up with him, the patience, every moment I grit my teeth when he did something that irked me, and the times I could not lash out. Don't get me wrong, he is a great person. But he has a lot of growing up to do. A lot. I hope he realizes this before his next relationship crumbles the same way as ours did. He has to accept that just because his girlfriend is lenient, doesn't mean he can do things and think she'll just forgive and be all hearts and flowers after. He also has to let go of his past or distance himself from it, and think of appropriate behavior when it comes to his ex-girlfriends. I could go on and on, but he just needs to learn many things about relationships. I get it that you've mostly had flings , but I think it's common sense on what you should do when you're in a "serious" relationship. I have never been in a serious relationship (or any relationship worth mentioning) but I know I treated you right. I may not have given you material things as much as have given me, but I gave you my love and every ounce of it. You know that. I thought about how you would think of my actions before I did anything, because I loved you. You didn't. That's when I knew it was over. Of course I thought how great it would be if you were here, or if I was with someone who was here, but I never did anything that I knew would upset you. I went to parties and was hit on, and I just smiled and carried casual conversations. But you? Remember when you got asked out by a girl and you told her, "I'll think about it"? Oh yeah, do you also remember we were together at that time? How about when you came up to her and told her, "I can't go on a date with you, I kinda have a girlfriend"? Kinda? Wow. What if I did that? Of course shit would rain down on me, and every time we'd fight, that would always come up, eh?

I really don't want to be snarky and bitchy about this. I really don't. But I ask for forgiveness since I can actually tell the world how I really feel.

Am I sad? Of course. You don't throw something like that to waste. But I would be a fool if I stayed. So I'm happy. Happier, even.